Cinematic Distractions

[dulcedemon]

Planet of the Vampires (Terrore nello spazio - 1965):
I do so love the high end of low budget. Some would argue that this is Mario Bava's masterpiece. I'm inclined to agree with them. There are several of his movies that I've yet to experience, but this is the best so far.
A pair of spaceships on an interplanetary exploration mission heed a distress call from an unexplored planet. The Argos, helmed by Captain Mark Markary, makes a relatively smooth landing. The other ship, the Galliot, crashes some distance away. After a concussive landing, several crew members are left feeling not quite themselves. It's as if their will is being usurped by some invisible force.
Once the crew of the Argos gathers their wits about them, they venture out in search of the Galliot. They are met with a sandy, craggy, smokey, volcanic world, which is thickly blanketed in a mysterious fog that rolls in and out like a tide. Jutting crystals and coral-like crags loom over a shifting terrain of black sand, boiling mud, and lava. Strange flickering blobs of light appear and disappear with the fog.
Danger lurks in the fog. Danger lurks in their sleep. During their search for the Galliot, they discover that they are not the only ones to have answered the distress call. They puzzle over the fate of those who came before them, the source of the distress call that lured them there, and whether they can make it back to Earth.
Barry Sullivan is probably the biggest star here, which isn't saying much. He was known for his supporting roles in Westerns more than anything. This rare leading role came fairly late in his career.
Chief among his co-stars is Norma Bengell as Sanya. She indirectly ties in with a movie that was featured a few lists ago, Black Cobra Woman (1976), which starred Laura Gemser, Jack Palance, and Gabriele Tinti. Norma Bengell was once married to Gabriele Tinti. The couple divorced in 1969.
Barry Sullivan was the only one on the set who spoke nothing but English. The other actors, director, and crew spoke either Italian or Spanish. The language barrier made for a challenging production.
His negative attitude toward director Mario Bava and actress Norma Bengell didn't make things any easier. Apparently, Sullivan was no joy to work with and was said to have derisively referred to her as "Norma Bang-Well". I would have liked to have heard her thoughts on him.
The spacesuits the actors wear look like they could be leather, but they are rubber. I love the way they look. They remind me of the Thalmor uniforms in The Elder Scrolls:Skyrim video game.
The screenplay for this movie was based upon the Italian science fiction short story, One Night of 21 Hours by Renato Pestriniero. A number of significant changes were made from the short story to screenplay. There were also changes made from the screenplay to the movie as it was shot.
There is a great deal of forced perspective camera trickery and ingenious low budget special effects. The boiling mud/lava is actually polenta. When the Argos lands on the alien planet, the ship descends slowly and awkwardly. Many small bubbles effervesce from the underside of its hull as if it were landing underwater. That shot was achieved by dropping the spaceship model in an aquarium. Look very closely on the far right in that scene and you will see a finger holding it down.
I learned all the technical details and behind-the-scenes gossip from the brilliant commentary track by film critic and Mario Bava biographer Tim Lucas. Other fun extras on the DVD include a partial alternate score, and the original short story. After reading the latter, I'm glad they made the changes that they did.
This was my second rental of Planet of the Vampires. I saw it several years ago and recalled little of it apart from the striking costumes and the vibrant, jewel-tone hues used in the lighting and set design. Very quickly I was reminded of its somniferous pacing. It's more than the pacing. It's the colors, shapes, textures, and sounds. It's everything. Maybe there is some hypnotic, sleep-inducing quality in Barry Sullivan's voice or the score. Maybe it rolls in with the fog.
Luckily for me, one of my favorite parts is near the beginning. It's the technobabble announcement made as the Argos and Galliot prepare to land on the alien planet:
"Attention. Attention all crew members, prepare for landing. In sixty fractions of Megon, we'll start the landing maneuver. The intensity of the gravitational field will be maintained at the wave moment of force G7.
Synchronize the meteor rejector on the electro-magnetic control device. Apply neuro-vascular tension. Suppress cortical areas X, Y, Z. Insert the automatic controls. We will keep a distance of 2 Parsecs from our sister ship Galliot."

Werewolf by Night (2022):
Marvel, black and white, monstrous, gothic, bestial, supernatural horror yum-yum! It's such a shame there is only one.
I like that it's in black and white save for a judicious bit of color here and there. I like the dysfunctional family angle. I like the monster hunters. I like the twist. I like Ted.

Pitfall (Otoshiana - 1962):
A miner and his young son travel from place to place in search of work. When we first meet them, they are so destitute that the father is working for nothing more than the meals his employer provides. Another man works with him. Both men are military deserters.
They make a fateful decision to seek paid work from a larger mine headquartered in a nearby city. They are faced with the dilemma of needing to get hired but not wanting to identify themselves. The police shoot deserters on the spot.
Their employers are happy to exploit them. Making matters worse, the regular miners are on strike. What they thought was a golden opportunity is nothing more than a chance to be scabs. There is one company, two mines, and two unions. They are all at odds with each other, and the workers at the larger mine are on strike.
Dad gets pulled aside by his boss one day. They want him to go to the other mine and meet with the union boss there. He can't refuse, so he sets off with his son in tow. The other mine is in a rural area. It's a decrepit and mostly spent mud wallow compared to the one in the city. The mining village appears to be deserted save for a woman who runs a snack shop.
This has been described as a ghost story. I would describe it as a movie about union busting in which there are ghosts. I was already familiar with director Hiroshi Teshigahara, having seen Woman in the Dunes (1964), and I chose this movie for that reason.

Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries: Season 01: Disc 04 (2012):
The fourth and final disc of the first season is covered thoroughly with Foyle. It contains three episodes. The first two of which are linked by a great deal of contrivance to Murdoch Foyle. It's a season finale divided into three episodes, but there is no indication of that up front. I'm glad I stuck with it long enough to witness the resolution of the Foyle-Jane plot.
That being said, there were a few cringe inducing moments in regard to some of the dialogue and affectations. This series isn't terribly old, but I think if it were made today, parts of Blood and Circuses and Murder in the Dark would be altered to reflect a more enlightened and inclusive attitude. Then again, maybe not.
I enjoy mysteries. I adore the fashions and trappings of the time period in which this one is set. Although I really want to see it through for the ever so adorable Hugh and Dot, I'm taking a break of indeterminate length from this series.

Rich and Strange (1931):
This one is for Alfred Hitchcock aficionados. Most people probably haven't heard of it. The thing I like best about it is the title. Sadly, Rich and Strange was changed to East of Shanghai for American audiences.
A financially strapped married couple is tired of the daily grind, when they receive an inheritance windfall from the husband's uncle. The money comes with a letter urging them to live it up and travel. They leave on a sea voyage around the world. The husband promptly gets seasick. The wife is left to mingle with the other passengers on her own for much of the trip.
Rich and strange aptly describes the people they meet, the places they visit, and the customs they observe. Sometimes only one applies, other times both. There are three other passengers with whom most of the action happens: Commander Gordon, The Old Maid, and The Princess. I don't know why the women lack proper names. That's how they are listed in the credits. One of the three is not who they purport to be.
Somewhere east of Shanghai, the worst happens, and they are forced to abandon ship. Our married duo hops a ride with some local fisherman, and that's when the audience learns why almost no one mentions this film when discussing Hitchcock's body of work. There is a whole lot of racism crammed into those scenes. Some of it involves cat as cuisine. The thing with the cat is played for laughs in that both husband and wife rush to vomit over the side of the boat after they realize what they have eaten. Keep in mind, this is a romantic comedy. Comparatively, it's one of the lighter moments. No wonder Hitchcock became known for suspense and horror.
I'm glad I rented it again if only for the better transfer. This was much cleaner and brighter. It did not reveal a better movie, but it allowed me to clearly judge it for what it is. I think Joan Barry was cast in the lead to make the audience say, "What a schmuck! He is lucky to have her. She could do better."
Funny enough, by which I mean she is actually funny, the best performance comes from the old maid character played by Elsie Randolph. She gloms on as the third wheel to everyone's business. No one can stand her, but she is either oblivious or doesn't care. She is living her best devoid of self-awareness life. At one point, she is dressed in a rather sexy evening gown. They put a granny shawl over her shoulders to dowdy it down, but it doesn't quite do the trick. While she is in no danger of upstaging the ravishing Joan Barry, her figure is not the reason she is cruising the globe single. Many years later, Elsie Randolph would have a small role in another one of Hitchcock's films: Frenzy (1972).
The DVD included Alfred Hitchcock Presents: The Sorcerer's Apprentice (1962), starring Diana Dors, David J. Stewart, and Brandon De Wilde. A mentally disturbed young man seeks refuge at a traveling carnival, where he gets taken in by a magician and his sultry assistant. I have seen this episode on television several times. The quality of the transfer here is terrible. Brandon De Wilde was best known as the kid from Shane (1953). His life ended tragically in a car accident when he was only thirty years old. Also on the disc is a special introduction by Tony Curtis. Why Tony Curtis? I have no clue.
Since Rich and Strange is no place to start for anyone new to Alfred Hitchcock, here are my recommendations:
The Man Who Knew Too Much (1934) - I prefer this one to the 1956 remake because of Peter Lorre.
The Lady Vanishes (1938) - If you must start somewhere, it might as well be on a train.
Shadow of a Doubt (1943) - Small town thrills, chills, and family drama. Hume Cronyn as the morbid, oddball, true crime obsessed neighbor puts this one over the top.
Rope (1948) - Based upon a true crime.
Dial M for Murder (1954) - It's a dialogue heavy slow burn, but it has Grace Kelly and phone drama. It inspired many bizarre knockoffs and spoofs over the years.
The Birds (1963) - This was my first. I was seven or eight years old. This and Psycho (1960) are solid horror films.
Frenzy (1972) - A brilliant demonstration of how a predator hides in plain sight and casts away suspicion through charm, guile, and personal connections.
The Trouble with Harry (1955) - Hitchcock took another and better shot at romantic comedy.

Royal Tramp (Luk ting kei - 1992):
It's dick jokes, dick jokes, titty-twisters, crotch grabs, and more dick jokes in this adolescent slapstick wuxia comedy starring Stephen Chow. I can't believe I waited almost fifteen years for this. This movie became unavailable not long after I had added it to the rental queue. It remained so until late last month.
I don't know how much was lost in translation. The backstory text at the beginning of the movie isn't translated at all. The subtitles are sparse. The grammar is poor. More often than not, the white subtitles are rendered illegible by light-colored backgrounds. There is no English audio track available. The character names are anglicized in the subtitles but not in the cast credits. Stephen Chow is Wilson Bond in the movie, but in cast lists on IMDb and Wikipedia his character is Wai Siu-bo.
I did my best to follow along in spite of it all. FYI: I was intoxicated when I watched it.
To the best of my understanding, Stephen Chow's character tells wild stories and provides comic relief to customers waiting to be served at the brothel where his sister works. He gets swept into a group of anti-imperial rebels after he saves their leader's ass from the cops. They recruit him to infiltrate the Forbidden City with the goal of purloining some secret documents.
The rebels have a guy on the inside who gets Chow placed among the palace eunuchs without him actually physically becoming one. So many dick jokes! Since Chow is there to steal documents, undercover rebel guy on the inside puts him up to also stealing a rare and valuable book of sutras, which is in the possession of the empress herself.
Chow gets caught trying to snag the book by the princess, who turns him over to her brother the emperor. After some back and forth, a few more dick jokes, a brutal titty-twister, and very awkward crotch grab, the emperor tasks Chow with spying on one of his generals. Chow is stuck working at the behest of no less than three parties. If any one of them finds out about the others, he will be killed.
I finished it only because I had waited so long for it. There is a sequel, but I don't care.